Motivation is one of those things that’s always been lauded as the corner stone for a great life. You can see how deeply rooted it is in our society when watching any sports advertisement, these peak athletes who do whatever it takes to get to the top. However, in my own life motivation feels elusive and almost mythical. I have often gone months without the desire to truly stick to one thing, I frequently give up a hobby when I find it too taxing or too boring. Now obviously this is a problem. For one, it means I can never excel in things because I don’t have the motivation to truly continue to practice hard at it. I just lack the conviction to see things through. Is this a character flaw? Possibly. Either way it is something that I’ve been actively trying to change about myself. One of the big ways that I recently did this was by forcing myself to wake up at 7am every day. I have to say that I have never been much of a morning person, I have always been someone that went to sleep at 3 or 4 am and then slept until mid morning. But I began to suspect this horrible sleeping pattern was damaging my health. I should say that I have tried to become a morning person in the past to no avail, I’m a night owl through and through. But something different happened this time. After having read “The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business” by Charles Duhigg I was brimming with motivation to get myself back on track. I at first tried to change my sleep habit by getting up immediately and taking a shower, which did not work at all and within days I was back to sleeping in late. Next, I simply got early and then soldiered through the day on little sleep. Somehow this worked, and although truthfully the 2 weeks it took me to get my sleep schedule fixed were absolute hell. I felt exhausted all the time, I had frequent headaches, and my mind felt foggy. Yet, after those 2 weeks of adjustment I was able to fall asleep at a reasonable time and then wake up at 8 am. What I can’t wrap my head around is where the willpower to stick to those horrible 2 weeks suddenly came from. To be honest, although I hated waking up late and feeling like I had to rush through my day; I wasn’t that invested in becoming a morning person. And yet I was determined to find what was going to work.
Now it’s been long enough that I’m not afraid that I will slip back into bad habits, but even still there is this inner motivation that keeps me from pushing myself awake past an hour that I know will mess up my new schedule. I think present frustrations stem from wanting to know how the world I can harness that motivation and willpower that I clearly somehow possess and apply it to other areas of my life. I truly do not know how to do that though. I guess if I did I would be publishing my own self-help book!
Nonetheless, it’s an interesting dilemma I’ve been facing. I’m still trying to figure out how I can tap into that part of myself, because I know that sticking to things is the only way I will be able to move forward. Yet, for all these years I haven’t been able to ever do that.
If anyone has any good self-help books or motivating podcasts that I should give a try then please let me know!
Into The Void 